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Wikipedia:Peer review/Gardens of Versailles/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review for consideration as a future featured article.


Thanks, --17:33, 27 April 2008 (UTC)J-B Poquelin (talk)

Review by Wackymacs

[edit]

Alright, there's a lot of stuff to cover...so this isn't going to be short:

  • Put the "Plan of the chateau of Versailles" image (the first image of the article) somewhere else - it is common on Wikipedia for infoboxes to always go right at the top, next to the lead paragraphs.
  • The lead needs to be re-written from scratch. It should be two-three paragraphs long, and fully summarize the article. See WP:LEAD. Always start with the Article title. For example: "The Gardens of Versailles were..."
  • I also suggest you do not put a wiki-link in the article title in the lead. So, "Gardens of Versailles" instead of "Gardens of Versailles".
  • The writing style seems odd at first. "This discussion will address the history and evolution of the gardens starting with Louis XIII and ending with the present day." - Is this a discussion? I thought it was an encyclopedic article. This sort of writing sounds like something that would belong in an essay.
  • The article is under-linked throughout. Names of people should be linked using the standard [[ and ]] brackets.
  • Avoid using lists. Instead, use prose. For example: "first, second, first" instead of a list of those three items.
  • Please see Wikipedia:Lists for the correct usage of lists. The sub-sections in your article "Parterre d’Eau" and "Perfection of the Bosquets" are incorrect ways of using lists.
  • Don't link words in section headers. (I'm referring to the section titled "The July Monarchy; The Second Empire")
  • You have too many sections that have only 2-3 sentences. Please reorganize your section headers to ensure paragraphing is neat and collective instead of sparse.
  • Avoid squashing text between images (as you have done in the sub-section Case of the ‘Apollo Perigrinator’). Keep all images in a section on one side of the article (right, or left). Please see Wikipedia:LAYOUT#Images.
  • Most of the sub-sections under "Bosquets and the Case of the ‘Apollo Perigrinator’" are just lists. Convert to paragraphs to improve flow and provide additional context to the reader.
  • I would say the article has too many images. Remove them wisely to improve the layout. People come to Wikipedia for real information - not just a bunch of pictures.
  • Most of this article is unreferenced. Every paragraph needs to be cited properly using the <ref> tags. Please see Wikipedia:Citing sources and Wikipedia:Citation templates.
  • The "Sources" list is useless as it stands. Is this Further reading, or are these real references you have used? Please title the section accordingly. (Either "Further reading" or "References")
  • But most importantly: reference everything. As I said, every paragraph needs at least one footnote. When this ends up at WP:FAC, this article will get nowhere unless it is properly referenced.
  • Please get a copy-editor to go through the text. See Wikipedia:Peer_review/volunteers#General_copyediting for a list of people who may be able to help you.
  • Please see User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 1a for help with satisfying FA Criteria 1a, which concerns quality of writing.
  • It is vital you pay attention to Wikipedia:Featured article criteria if you want this to become featured.
  • Once you have done all of this, submit to WP:GA instead of WP:FA at first - a GA reviewer might give you even more feedback. GA is the second step to featured article status after a peer review.

I hope my feedback helps. I have focused on article layout, references and the images. I have not focused on the grammar, punctuation, and quality of text. — Wackymacs (talk) 18:27, 30 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comment: It is often useful to have a model article to follow for style, references, structure, etc. I note that York Museum Gardens is a Good Article and may be a useful model. There are some palace GA and FA articles too that have sections on their gardens - Buckingham Palace is FA. Ruhrfisch ><>°° 21:00, 30 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]